Boy, that was fragmented. What should I have done for years leading up to today to prepare for reading this? Gaming? Doomscrolling social media? Chugging Mountain Dew? Reading poetry?
It's very unique to LinkedIn. OP's prose is difficult to process even if you've abused your brain for years with LinkedIn content, though. In a more merciful timeline, only people like James Ellroy or Cormac McCarthy would ever attempt to write like that.